Whenever I get upset, I buy something. I am a consumer. I used to be more than that. I used to be an idealist. I remember a time, not so long ago, when I believed in things and wanted to change things for the better.
Of course, I still believe the world could be better. It is just that I no longer have so much faith in my ability to influence matters. And so I consume. An argument with an aggressive youth? I reward myself with yet another CD. Not enough seats on the tram to work? I treat myself to a beer. (After work, obviously.) I own lots of CDs and I drink a lot of beer and the world fails to get any better.
So why have I disenfrachised myself? Why have I adopted the I-can't-make-a-difference attitude of the (and please forgive here the archaic Marxist terminology but I can't think of a better one) lumpenproletariat? Those at the bottom of the economic scale have an excuse. They are also at the bottom, on the whole, of the education spectrum and are less likely to be able to influence their environment. They are less likely to network with the movers and shakers in the local community, less likely to be on first name terms with their local councillors or MP, less likely to be able to move house, change jobs or choose a school than the average person. Their excuse is that they are right. They have very little control over their own lives. Their tragedy is compounded by the fact that their status as consumers is, by definition, limited.
I have no such excuse. I know my MP many of the local councillors. I associate with a wide variety of middle-class professionals and businessmen and I have the good fortune to have received a university education entirely bankrolled by the state. I have a job which I enjoy and which pays me enough money to live.
My job also provides me with the ability to reward myself, should I suffer any minor discomfort, with CDs and beer. And I am filled with an overwhelming feeling that this is a life not well lived. I also suspect that I am not alone in this. Surely there are many like me, people who know that they are freewheeling through life. The nature of this malaise, though, is that we are unconnected. By opting out of organising anything, we are unorganised. Silent majority or silent minority, we are silent.
This "blog", then, is my voice. In it, I will make comments about the nature of life in the UK at the beginning of the 21st century and try to make sense of it.
